This morning I’ve been pondering the strange blessing of medicines and healing.
While I am not in any way opposed to “modern medicine” and, in fact, am a grateful beneficiary of new scientific discoveries, I am also as skeptical as the next person and aware of the downsides of pharmaceuticals and empire medicine.
My dad has always been an Appalachian folk-healer of sorts, as was his dad before him, though I doubt he's fully contemplated how this legacy is linked to the region. My father is definitely a man of science and education with a doctorate from Duke. However, commonplace in my upbringing has been learning about herbs and natural, practical solutions to the challenges of being in a body. Mom and Dad have, when given a choice and with discernment, minored in medical interventions and have majored in self-care. We've made many helpful discoveries in my memory and I've carried on that legacy. Now it has become apparent that the exiling of “holistic” practices by the establishment was hardly reasonable or rational - that cautious self-education benefits the overloaded medical complex greatly while remaining scientific - just not institutionally scientific. And perhaps if such had been encouraged we wouldn't be so easily influenced, culturally, by tricksters.
Sure, there's trial and error and rumors and superstitions in folk practice as in all things. We see that across disciplines.
From August through December of 2023 I was benefiting from a traditionally- prescribed medicine that I hated to give up. But I have been shocked and pleased at how my mood has improved. During that season I was anxious and emotional and I'm now concerned that it may have affected my reasoning. I also became very ill and life was exceptionally brutal. I wouldn't repeat October through December for a million dollars.
Having some distance now, I am aware that I feel more myself. But the problem with all of these kinds of assessments is that there are many other changes that happen in our lives in any season. I've done some deep personal work as well. How much does that have to do with how I'm feeling now?
I don't know. Life is flux.
It is best for me to be grateful for the privileges I have to try different avenues to support my well-being, and assume the best about others who may be in flux, too. I have a replacement now, also traditionally prescribed, and it's working beautifully. I'm grateful for both of my pharmaceutical prescriptions and will be glad when/if I don't need them.
This morning I was prompted to consider the spheres (Jupiter in particular) and the way they are aligning with my last six years. Taking responsibility for my embodied evolution seems like God’s great gift in that time frame. I haven't felt helpless in a long time. At least not on a consistent basis. Perhaps this has been the most healing thing of all. I imagined what I was capable of and the beauty and the largeness of it and stepped into it with faith. I'm not disappointed.
The greatest medicine in my mix is the rejection of shame and the desire to attend to my needs and the forever-transformation of this person. By doing so I have shed so much codependency and control. My life is a greater gift to those around me.
Regardless of which tools work and which ones don't, the devotion to the inner process and its outward manifestation has stayed constant. I belong to myself. Creator gave me life and full agency. Self does not oppose Creator. Self is incarnation of Divine Breath. The more we embrace this, the more our ego works for instead of against a sacred process.
That is very good medicine.
Image design by Frances
Image Description: [A woman sits on top of a lifeguard station on a beach, looking out. Above her in the sky Jupiter looms large. Jupiter says to her in a text bubble, “Dream Bigger.” Also in the sky are stars and the constellations Virgo and Scorpio. The overall hue of the image is pastel purple.]